A nomad at heart

She was a rebel in her own words.

Media’s muse, highlight of controversial reality shows.

Most viewed on social platforms,

Worshipped by lecherous stares,

Condemned by the flag-bearers of morality.

The topic of debate in grandiose news rooms,

Secretly admired by her hypocritical banishers.

She did not fit-in to the cultural stereotype of a lady,

Her sovereignty over her conduct

was considered an act of blasphemy.

The world watched her outrageous acts,

Ignorant to a life of abject neglect.

Ostracised by the society, she was a nomad at heart.

She perhaps found solace in her ailing father’s arms,

Or in her frail mother’s lap.

For she was the sole bread-winner,

and the “man” of the penurious household.

She was strangulated by her own blood,

the brother who had sworn to protect her for life.

In the name of honour, she was sacrificed.

The orbs of her eyes receding away forever,

In the last few breaths that she could manage,

She would have wished for a better world,

If ever she had to come back!

Desire

I want! I want! I want!

Is it avarice? Or is it being human?

Lost in the dilemma..to understand the eccentric covetousness..

Resurrection

The other day someone asked me the meaning of "Resurrection". I answered at an impulse - It means "Rising from the dead". But then it got me thinking - how best to explain a word that holds such mystery in itself. How can their be a word for defining something which practically does not happen or rather is impossible? In school, we had a story in our text books where a mythical bird "Phoenix" had risen from its own ashes, and this was termed as "Resurrection". How very mesmerizing and enchanting. If only living beings could be revived once they're dead...

The world would not have known what "Loss" means..not known how it feels to depart forever from someone you love..not known the fear death beholds..not known the reverence for the almighty! Would that have been a better world? Opinions will differ on this motion. And I'm not going to side with any one specific opinion.

Death is natural. Plants wither to make space for new varieties. Animals perish to evolve into new species. The cycle of change is innate. But we say so only since we have not known another kind of world. Where people don't die, plants don't shrivel off, animals don't become extinct! What would happen if this was to be a reality? Well, one sure thing to come to everyone's mind would be that the planet would be overwhelmed with population of humans, animals and plants..we would be falling off the surface of earth and gravity might not be enough to hold us back! Wild imagination!

"Resurrection" - sounds extremely bewitching and fascinating...Everyone would want certain things to resurrect from their ashes while others would be good enough to remain buried deep somewhere. If only, we could choose...

Well, one thing I've resurrected recently is my blog..hope you like it and hope I keep it alive eternally...!

Virus attack

Is it too difficult to understand what you want from your life? To know what is your ultimate desire and the thing that would make you the happiest? To some, the answer might come naturally and they would think why do people waste their time over such frivolous questions. To others, these questions might sound very familiar and they would find their own dilemmas and thoughts being mirrored in these statements.

Often in our lives we go on doing what we ought to do, driven by social norms or family expectations. However, more often than not, we do what we do because we dont know what is it that we're best at. That which will make us happiest by giving us the utmost satisfaction and self-worth taking us on the path of greatness. Don't misunderstand me. I dont in any way mean that greatness is subjective. Every individual is great in his / her own being. However, true greatness is achieved when you've inspired at least one person in your lifetime to become like you.

Humans are mortal beings and the most developed amongst all species. Naturally, they have desires and dreams more complicated than other living beings. To fulfill those desires, it is not enough to have the basic amenities and be done with it (though for some less fortunate ones of our race, basic necessities might be all that they desire!). Reality is, when we get what we want most dearly and desperately, we often tend to get too familiar with it. And when the familiarity becomes a second nature, we suddenly want something more. Economists term this as the "theory of relativity". When we're hungry, the first bite tastes the best. Couple of bites later, the tastiness is less. And by the time we have a full stomach, the taste is "usual" and not so "special". So in such circumstances, how would you identify one thing that would make you eternally happy? Isn't it possible that what you want to do today would no longer keep you satisifed a couple of years later?

Well, let's try to find an answer to this question by going on a different tangent. Why do some love stories go on for a lifetime (even making history in some cases), while others get termed as "passing affairs"? What is it that keeps you interested in your partner for your life? Beauty? Brains? No, none of these. The answer is not something to do with a quality your partner posseses but with your perception of that quality or of your partner. The answer is "true love". I might write another long blog about what "true love" means, but for now, let's just think of it as a virus - the "TL virus". It is a virus that infects you and suddenly you know who is right for you.

Similarly, when you meet your ultimate goal in life, the "TL virus" will hit you and you'll experience the feeling called "true love". You'll then know what to do and all your doubts will be washed away. Most of us are waiting for the virus attack. Trouble is, it is very difficult to identify the symptoms. You might think that it is the real thing, but sometime later you might realize that it was a farce, a misconception and then you again begin your search for the virus.

I am also out there looking for the virus to attack me, waiting to get infected. Wish me luck!

The unknown future!!

The idea of being able to know the future has bewitched the human mind since time immemorial. One comes across varied modes adopted to peep in the unknown and the unseen. There are innumerous people who would be acclaimed (although falsely in majority of the cases) to be the best of the seers; uncountable number of studies facilitating the art of foreboding; and a horde of uncanny events which may lead one to believe that some of us mortals are indeed able to see the future.

Well, I don’t want to start a debate on the capabilities and credentials of those celebrated astrologers and prophets. For I believe them not to be completely farce, but then not even a shade near to perfect. So then why at all am I painstakingly creating this whole drama referring to the unknown tomorrow?

This I am doing since I feel and firmly believe that future is in fact not uncertain. Now don’t get me wrong. I am not going to be writing about how with determination, dedication, persistence, perseverance and blah-blah-blah one can ascertain the future. Instead, I am going to be writing about a feeling which I have since my childhood. A feeling, that the future is already ascertained by the almighty, the supreme force. In other words, I believe that the lives of each and every living being in this universe are predetermined with the minutest details. It’s like a film being played when it has already been directed. Nothing in the vastness of the universe is spontaneous. Each breath that we take, each movement that we make, each word spoken or unspoken, and each thought expressed or not has been decided in advance for us.

Hard to believe? Not for me. Have you ever experience or even heard of a phenomenon called “déjà vu”? Yes, the experience of thinking that a new situation had occurred before. It happens to each one of us. Though some of us can expressly understand what it is. Is it not curious how a situation might seem to have occurred before when you consciously know that you have never been in that situation earlier? How on earth can you ever explain a feeling that you have seen an episode of a TV serial before when you know that this is the first time it is being aired? Or, how is it that you feel you have been to somebody’s place or office earlier when you are meeting that person first time in your life? Or, even how can it be that small and immaterial scenes from your life like having a cup of coffee, sitting and chatting with a friend, passing a newspaper to a family member, crossing a particularly unknown road may seem to have occurred to you before? As if you have dreamed of it earlier!

This might not sound convincing enough, but for me it is all an indication of the fact that the future is in fact not uncertain. Yes, some of the seers are able to get a glimpse of it because it is there for them to see.

And as they say, “If wishes were horses, likes of mine would gladly ride”, how I wish that I was able to see into my future. Not as broken pieces in my dreams which later lead to déjà vu, but as a whole and definite thing, with no uncertainties or doubts. But alas! Again, the wisdom of the Greater One strikes. We cannot and are not supposed to know what is going to happen to us. Won’t that take out the fun and excitement out of living? How mean of Him to plan things like this. But so it has been done, and we have no choice but to abide by it. However, it sure shows us the path to a little more wisdom. Wisdom to be complacent when we have to be and at the same time not losing the zest to live and achieve more. Wisdom to understand, enjoy and savor in the reality of the present, to live and cherish what “is”, rather than wasting away in the wait of what “will be”. For what will come will come, and we will have to face it when it does.

“Discovery of the unknown flaws”

I like to believe that I am the Best. Well who doesn’t? But I would like to confess here that I used to believe (till recent past) that I am the Best in whatever I do and whoever I am, and that I can easily achieve (may be faster and better than anyone else) whatever I try my hands on. Though I still believe that I am good, the self-obsession has somewhat been replaced by self-realization. To put it simply, I am thankful for whatever happened to me, because it made me see the plain fact which was by far eluding me. The fact that I was taking my life and my capabilities for granted. Yes I was!

I would not describe here the trail of events that made me realize what I did. Because it really does not matter what brought about an awakening. What matters is the learning and the transformation within.

I failed; to understand the difference between a positive self esteem and self-importance turning to egotism; to identify the fine line between considering yourself worthy and considering others unworthy; to execute what I firmly believed in that luck favors those who put in the effort. And I have no regrets in confessing and accepting that I failed. They say that each failure is a step towards success. And so do I believe. However disturbing the implications of the revelation might be, it still is a revelation.

I wanted to run away from my flaws; I hoped them to be a nightmare; I expected everything to turn OK all by itself. How foolish I was.

So now on a few resolutions –
Stop being self obsessed and accept that you may be at fault
Stop ridiculing yourself even if you do commit a mistake
Learn to take a stand howsoever difficult it may seem
Come out of the comfort zone and face the world

And a few key learnings –
Decisions may be difficult but sometimes they have to be made
Life may be dull but find out the hidden bright moments (they may sometimes by very obvious)
Appreciate what you have
Try and work to become the person that you always aspire to be

Oh great! I have become a motivational writer…. ;-)

The road less traveled...

“Two roads diverged in the woods, and I……..
I took the less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference!”

Robert Frost wrote these beautiful and inspiring lines which never fail to imbibe in the reader a confidence to go on with his / her decisions. Even though the decisions might not adhere to the rules and restrictions laid down by the masses.

How very unfortunate it is that the likes of me (even though I am also deeply inspired by these lines) whose mind is full of mischief can easily make out an entirely opposite translation or interpretation of such a masterpiece. Well, taking the less traveled path does indeed make a difference, but had it not been good if only the poet would have specified the difference to be on the positive side.

Oh, how foolish I am being. That would have erased the entire beauty of these poetic lines. The essence of poetry lies in the hidden, the unseen, and the unread. It is your interpretation, your perspective and understanding that makes it meaningful.
You can easily deduce that the difference in your life could not all be on the better side if you go on the road suggested by Mr. Frost. And seriously, to give it a thought, had it been all positive, beautiful and rosy, our poet would not have taken pains to pen these revolutionary thoughts in such a manner.

Yes, the road less traveled is the road to take. Not because it will give you all roses and happiness, but because it will ultimately turn your life meaningful. The path may be more dangerous, with unknown surprises which may be even hideous sometimes; it may be more testing in terms of requiring your effort and your time; it might give you pains which you would never have imagined; but in the end it is this path that will take you to your destination. Destination which is nothing but a revelation. A revelation that the end lies within the journey; that the ultimate rest comes with constant movement; movement which continuously gives and sometimes does take; it takes your body, your mind, your heart, your soul to live this journey.

Do I sound like I am trying to become a saint? I am not honestly. Its just that I have found within me a need for constant movement and energy, a need for regular rejuvenation, a continuous learning; only than can I call myself accomplished; only then can I call myself educated.